finding that someone special is a service offered by the dating agency E-Harmony

I decided to complete the rigorous questionnaire in the vain attempt to become one of those smiling couples on the advert.

i was disheartened to recieve this email reply stating that there were no matches for me…

i called them to discuss my predicament


thats all…if you want love & have ginger hair then don’t click here


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4 Responses to “KIM NOBLE on : DATING AGENCIES are Anti-Ginger.”

  1. Markus Says:

    Kim, intrigued by your eHarmony rejection, and because Amy’s away ‘at a conference’, I decided to take the eHarmony test myself. I attempted to give as true, yet vivid account of myself (I pictured John Major as ‘somewhat’, Leatherface as ‘not at all’ and some unattainable state of grace – poss. drug-slim Jim Morrison – as ‘very’). I too couldn’t mention my unkempt beard (increasingly white and cat lady’s mingey), but, thankfully, I’m not ginger (oh, except for some of that beard of mine). Guess what? I got the same message. EHarmony is bollocks (which I also didn’t have to mention, their slow pendulous descent and Moore Marriot lookaliking) – I know there’s someone out there for me (even if she’s ‘at a conference’).

    It might be that Amy would’ve been dealt an eHarmony rejection too, and that’s a trick their missing – match all those they can’t match, rejects for rejects (we can all be teddy bears saved from the waste bins to become Super Teds of Love).

    The eHarmony form seemed eager for me to confess to some druggy perversion (‘do you always read the leaflet before taking medication’, ‘do you remember to take any medication’, ‘do you like to look at physically attractive women’, ‘have you ever spied on physically attractive women’). It’s no wonder people turn to those sites where a photo of your cock or tits suffice!

  2. Julie Says:

    My condolences. You do realize that there are hair colors for people in your situation, don’t you? You could always find a match, then “come clean” later on.

    Also, there’s a typo in your post. The fourth word should be “someone.”

  3. autodespair Says:

    oh dear, that wasn’t very helpful.

    trying to cope with a similar state of affairs i have decided to dedicate an immense amount of time editing and cropping footage of porn, adverts and tv to remove all traces of people, i wouldn’t say it’s helping much but it kills a lot of time

    if i’m lucky i am so exhausted by watching the footage frame by frame that i am, on occasion able to get to sleep at night

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